There is much debate as to whether or not physical discipline should be used. What form of discipline should be used?
When I was a child, you never back chatted, never swore, you did not ask for things unless they were offered to you and then it was “yes please” or “no thank you”, you respected your parents (my parents never hit us but when you got “that look” you knew what time of day it was”)….sadly these days this is not the norm.
Before I had children my thoughts would sway as to what action should be taken when a child is disobedient. For example… if a child is kicking, screaming and throwing a tantrum in public demanding things I would think “why doesn’t that parent spank the child” then on the other hand if a parent spanked a child I’d think “child abuse” Basically it was a case of your damned if you do and your damned if you don’t.
My personal view is that spanking a child should be used as a last resort when all other attempts fail
Try to reason with the child or explaining the consequences of their actions, the whys and why nots. (Bribery works in the interim)[:(][;)]
What are your thoughts on discipline?
||Na nekolku pati sum go gledal 'Super Nanny' show na ABC ili NBC television i eve ja nejzinata rutina za disciplina na deca koja shto dosta mi se svigja.
When your child does something unacceptable:
- Go down to their level
- Make eye contact
- Tell them they did something unacceptable
- Warn them that if they do that again they will go to the Naughty Chair
- If the bad behavior is repeated, take the child and sit him in the Naughty Chair
- Explain why they are sitting there and to stay there until you come and get him
- The length of the time-out is determined by their age: 1 minute X their age. A timer would be useful here and a visual indication for the child to watch the time go by.
- At the end of the time-out, the child must apologize.
- For an older child, they can go to a “Naughty Room” that is not their bedroom and does not have a TV or other activities; it has to be a boring place.
- For a younger child, the time-out should take place in a “Naughty Chair” that is placed close-by the main play area, but again not in a bedroom or eating place. The first step of the stairs, if you have stairs, is a good place for a toddler.
- Either way, you cannot associate a time-out with a place where they sleep or eat or play, or else they will refuse to sleep, eat, or play there.
2. Meal time
- If a child is still sitting in a high chair away from the table, he should be moved to the main table so he can feel he is a part of the family, he can be seen easily by all – instead of mom having to turn to see the child. This will minimize the bad-behavior at the table. A booster seat placed on a chair is good. Or just push the highchair up to the table, removing the tray, and then the child can use the table to eat off of like the rest.
3. Nap time
- Nap time should be scheduled at a certain time each day and must end by 3pm so that the child will be able to sleep at bedtime.
- Kids resist nap time because they want to keep playing. A nap time routine will help transition the child from play time to nap time.
4. Clingy/Whiny Child
The clingy or whiny child uses clinginess, whining, and other bad behaviors to get attention and get what they want. To break this cycle, you have to teach them that these things will not get them what they want.
- Go down to their level
- Make eye contact
- Keep a small distance
- Explain to them that you will listen to them when they stop clinging/whining/crying/screaming
- When they calm down, give them a hug and then ask them what they want and do it for them. If it’s something you don’t approve of, distract them with something else.
- Remove them from the situation and use distraction
5. Bed time
- Make a set time for bed time
- Develop a bedtime routine: bath, brush teeth, read a book.
- Place in their bed, kiss goodnight
· Phase I:
o Sit on the floor next to their bed.
o If they get out of bed, place them back in bed
o Do not talk at any time, keep silent at all times
o No eye contact at any time
· Phase II:
o Sit in a nearby room
o If they get out of bed, place them back in bed and go back out without talking or looking at him/her