| Aritmetika | |
| BorisVM | ROMANCE MATHEMATICS Smart man + smart woman = romance Smart man + dumb woman = affair Dumb man + smart woman = marriage Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy ______________________________ OFFICE ARITHMETIC Smart boss + smart employee = profit Smart boss + dumb employee = production Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime _____________________________ SHOPPING MATH A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs. A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need. _____________________________ GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. _____________________________ HAPPINESS To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all. ______________________________ LONGEVITY Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die. ______________________________ PROPENSITY TO CHANGE A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does. _____________________________ DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. _____________________________ HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals. |
| misko | hheheeheheheheheehehehehe |
| suschestvo | Za vreme na poseta na psihijatriska bolnica, novinar go prasa direktorot na bolnicata vrz osnova na sto odlucuvaat koga te primaat vo bolnica na lecenje: - Mnogu ednostavno, ke go stavime pred kada napolneta so voda, ke mu dademe lazica, casa i kofa, pa ke mu kazeme da ja isprazni vodata na najbrziot nacin. - Aha, razbiram... - odgovora novinarot - Znaci, onoj sto e normalen ke pocne da vadi voda so kofata? - Ne, toj sto e normalen ke ja izvadi zatkata od dnoto na kadata. Sakate soba so balkon ili bez? ===> Arhitmedika |
| suschestvo | Se izvinuvam za dijalektot ! [8D] Subject: #268;isto iz matemati#269;kog vi#273;enja > Iz #269;isto matemati#269;kog ugla gledanja i#353;lo bi to ovako: > #352;ta #269;ini celinu (100%)? #352;ta to zna#269;i davati vi#353;e od 100%? > Da li ste se ikada zapitali #353;ta misle ljudi koji tvrde da daju vi#353;e od 100%. > Svako od nas je zacelo bio na jednom od onih sastanaka na poslu gde se od nas zahteva da dajemo vi#353;e od 100% . > Kako da dosegnemo na primer 103% ? > #352;ta to predstavlja u stvarnom #382;ivotu? > Predstavljam vam jednostavnu matemati#269;ku formulu, koja #263;e vam, > kao #353;to je i meni, pomo#263;i da prona#273;ete odgovore na gornja pitanja. > Ako zapi#353;emo: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z > i saberemo vrednosti na slede#263;i na#269;in: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 > Sledi da: H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K (naporan rad) 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98% i K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E (znanje) 11+14+15+23+12+5+4++7+5 = 96% Pa A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E (odnos prema poslu) 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100% i B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T (to ve#263; znate #353;ta je) 2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103% Ili pogledaj kuda te ljubljenje mo#382;e dovesti A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G (srpski: ljubljenje guzice, uvla#269;enje) 1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118% Iz toga mo#382;emo matemati#269;kom sigurno#353;#263;u utvrditi da nas NAPORAN RAD i ZNANJE dovede blizu cilja, ODNOS PREMA POSLU nas dovede do #382;eljenog cilja ... Dok nas UVLA#268;ENJE i LJUBLJENJE GUZICE izbaci visoko iznad svih granica ... Have a nice day ... =>back to aritmetika |