Telling it like it is

Telling it like it is
SydneyGuy	http://tinyurl.com/m99pd
SydneyGuy	A man walks into a bar and orders a double whiskey, then skulls it. He then orders another double, and skulls that as well. Then a third double, once again skulling it. The barman asks what this patron's reasons are for drinking so much in such a hurry. The man replies, "I've just had my first blowjob." "Congratulations," says the barman. "Here, have another one on the house." "Nah," replies the man, "if three doubles don't get rid of the taste from my mouth, nothing will."
SydneyGuy	A boy in sixth class comes home after school one day. His mother notices that he's got a big smile on his face. She asks, "did anything special happen at school today?" "Yes, mum. I had sex with my English teacher!" The mother is stunned. "You're going to talk about this with your father when he gets home." Well, when dad comes home and hears the news he is pleased as punch. Beaming with pride, he walks over to his son and says, "son, I hear you had sex with your English teacher." "That's right, dad." "Well, you became a man today - this is cause for celebration. Let's head out for some ice cream, and then I'll buy that new bike you've been asking for." "That sounds great, dad, but can I have a football instead? My arse is killing me!"
SydneyGuy	Nigde nema grad kako ovoj ....... Veruvjte ili ne, ima grad vo Turcija so imeto 'Nigde' - pobarajte na Google ako ne mi veruvate, ili poglednete na ova web stranica: http://www.allaboutturkey.com/nigde.htm
SydneyGuy	Real-Life Help Line Situation If you can't laugh about this you need help.... This is a supposedly a true story from the Word Perfect help line. Needless to say the help desk employee was fired; however, the person is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "termination without cause". This is from the taped conversation leading up to dismissal : "Word Perfect Technical Desk, may I help you?" "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with Word Perfect." "What sort of trouble?" "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away." "Went away?" "They disappeared." "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?" "Nothing." "Nothing?" "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type." "Are you still in Word Perfect, or did you get out?" "How do I tell?" "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?" "What's a sea-prompt?" "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?" "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type!" "Does your monitor have a power indicator?" "What's a monitor?" "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. "Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?" "I don't know." "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?" "Yes, I think so." "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall." ".......Yes, it is." "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?" "No." "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable." "Okay, here it is." "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer." "I can't reach." "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?" "No." "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?" "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle-it's because it's dark." "Dark?" "Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window." "Well, turn on the office light then." "I can't." "No? Why not?" "Because there's a power outage." "A power... A power outage? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?" "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet." "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from." "Really? Is it that bad?" "Yes, I'm afraid it is." "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?" "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."